Shock reaction

Time crawls on this graveyard shift. I am in shock and very sad. Virgil is sad and sorry and ashamed. Earlier he was not able to tell me his thought processes exactly or why he decided to get high so that he could have sex with me. I feel betrayed, dirty and used. I can't understand why he thought that was ok. It's a disrespectful and dishonest thing to do. It's lying. I don't understand why Virgil would even think that I would want him to do that. I just keep thinking: what can he think of me? How little can he think of me that he would think of doing that? How bad have things got?

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