Tuesday, 17 May 2011

NSFW

Oh fucking hell, the stress of things being various. One of the designers at work just looked over my shoulder and asked me what the name of our sex party means. I told him that I would kill him if he looked it up but he just gave me a scurrilous grin. Now he's off home to find out, the firewall at work having prevented him from doing so already. Hopefully he'll forget, get distracted on the way home and be unable to remember the name he saw over my shoulder as I worked on something that was definitely NSFW. The thought of what might happen next makes me extremely uneasy.

For some time my life has been a juggling act between three distinct and (many would say) incompatible spheres. I organise an arty sex party for no money at all. At other times I doze my way through well-paid but glacial nightshifts on a scandalous rag. Finally, I also work in the field of, well... I'm not saying.

I operate with a sense of mild anxiety should any of the three parts of my life meet each other. It's like a Wenn diagram. My clients must know nothing of the other two sections; my employer may know about my clients but certainly not about the parties I organise; friends and contacts from the parties, once I trust them, get to know about the other things I do, although working for the rag gets me raised eyebrows from the more right-on of my circle.

I got sloppy and now I wonder what will happen. This could be the most enormous piece of gossip about me, or maybe Jonathan could just keep his trap shut...

And in case you were wondering, I don't tell the people I know about this blog.

Am I the most secretive person in the world?

2 comments:

  1. Perhaps what you really want is to be not so secretive hence taking the risk of getting caught...

    ReplyDelete
  2. To be honest, Anonymous, I do rather like creeping around. I know the argument that if you don't hide anything you can't be outed but it feels far too risky. Also, anonymity enables full expression without over-sharing.

    ReplyDelete